By Yohannis Tammu
Excellent communicating in terms of speaking to people in front of us is a must-have qualification if we want to get our messages across to people whom we talk to, so our messages are connected to each other.
If we want to interact effectively with people to influence them, either they are business colleagues, neighbors, wives, children or anyone else, then the main point that we need to do first is to understand whom we talk to. This is the vital thing in EMPATHIC listening skill.
The point of “Try first to understand” requires great changes in the way we think (paradigm) inside us. Someone is usually listening not to understand but they are often listening to give reply. We are filtering everything through our own paradigms, saying our own opinions, citing our own autobiography toward other people’s lives. So the conversation will not run well and unpleasant because there is no connection binding between one and another, the data given by our speakers are not well analyzed, so that the solutions we give will be far from satisfying and from profound conversations.
Empathic listening skill requires far more just than memorizing and pondering. In communication with empathic listening skill, you need to listen by using your ears, eyes and heart. We are required to pay attention to feelings, behaviors and meanings of words that being said by the speakers. Use your right and left brain all at once in this communication. By using eyes, ears, heart and feelings of the right and left brain at once, we will understand what is meant by our speakers with empathic effort (placing yourself in the position of your speaker). By doing so, we will be able to give the right responses, words, respects and solutions in case of our speakers request solutions from us for what he/she has gone through. Try to be more understanding in communicating so that you will accomplish communication technique with EMPATHIC listening skill.
You may fail the first conversations, but don’t be discouraged. Try again and again. Like commonly scientists in inventing and creating their works, they failed one or two times or even several thousand times, but they kept trying to the point they succeeded and we enjoys what they have invented in the past. Go have a try, God will surely bless you!
Source : 7 Habits book
Presented: By Yohannis Tammu